{"id":4327,"date":"2019-02-27T14:13:00","date_gmt":"2019-02-27T20:13:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/nafwb.org\/?p=4327"},"modified":"2019-02-27T14:13:00","modified_gmt":"2019-02-27T20:13:00","slug":"til-death-do-us-part","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/nafwb.org\/site\/til-death-do-us-part\/","title":{"rendered":"‘Til Death Do Us Part?"},"content":{"rendered":"

By R. F. Smith, Jr. <\/strong><\/p>\n

He was about 50. Came to his\u00a0pastor with a question about\u00a0that part of the marriage ceremony\u00a0which says, “‘Til death do\u00a0us part.” Wanted to know if after\u00a0death\u2014in heaven\u2014he would still\u00a0be married to his wife.<\/p>\n

The pastor figured something\u00a0deeper was behind his question. He asked him why he wanted to know.<\/p>\n

“Well,\u201d the man confessed, \u201cl was\u00a0just wondering about it. You see, I\u00a0think I can hang on until death\u2014but\u00a0heaven…?”<\/p>\n

Too much truth here to laugh. He\u00a0voiced feelings and fears for more\u00a0people than we dare admit. One\u00a0out of two marriages is not hanging on ’til death. (That’s our divorce\u00a0rate.)<\/p>\n

Some couples are asking that the\u00a0statement\u2014\u201c\u2019Til death do us\u00a0part”\u2014be taken out of the ceremony.\u00a0They want such phrases as:\u00a0“Until we are no longer compatible,”\u00a0or “Until we no longer find fulfillment,”\u00a0or “Until we no longer desire\u00a0each other.”<\/p>\n

Some are writing their own marriage\u00a0contracts in which they put\u00a0renewal options. They propose to\u00a0maintain the marriage for two\u00a0(maybe three) years after which\u00a0time they can decide to divorce or\u00a0renew the contract. Others are\u00a0leaving the phrase in the ceremony\u00a0but are not taking it seriously.\u00a0Many people are putting a big\u00a0question mark after the word,\u00a0“death,” in the phrase.<\/p>\n

And one wonders if marriage has\u00a0a chance when entered into without\u00a0a sense of permanency. Does it\u00a0not become more of a legitimate affair\u00a0to be terminated at the whim of\u00a0either, than a commitment of two\u00a0people to establish an environment\u00a0in which two personalities can\u00a0grow and flourish? Most of the\u00a0things we enter into on a temporary\u00a0basis become just that\u2014temporary.<\/p>\n

The professor urged us to attend\u00a0the concert. Beethoven’s works\u00a0would be featured. Then he told a\u00a0story:<\/p>\n

A college freshman who had\u00a0never heard of Beethoven or his\u00a0music wandered into the college\u00a0chapel where a Beethoven concert\u00a0was about to begin. He told the\u00a0professor sitting beside him he\u00a0thought he’d come to check out\u00a0the music. To give it a try.<\/p>\n

“Young man,” the professor\u00a0warned, “Beethoven is not on trial.\u00a0You are!”\u00a0The institution of marriage is not\u00a0on trial. It’s worth . . . beauty . . .\u00a0joy . . . meaningfulness has been\u00a0proved.<\/p>\n

And I doubt if its beauty and\u00a0meaningfulness can be discovered\u00a0short of the commitment. “‘Til\u00a0death do us part.”<\/p>\n

Article adapted from Contact <\/em>magazine, February 1991.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

By R. F. Smith, Jr. He was about 50. Came to his\u00a0pastor with a question about\u00a0that part of the marriage ceremony\u00a0which says, “‘Til death do\u00a0us part.” Wanted to know if after\u00a0death\u2014in heaven\u2014he would still\u00a0be married to his wife. The pastor figured something\u00a0deeper was behind his question. He asked him why he wanted to know. “Well,\u201d the man confessed, \u201cl was\u00a0just wondering about it. You see, I\u00a0think I can hang on until death\u2014but\u00a0heaven…?” Too much truth here to laugh. He\u00a0voiced feelings and fears for more\u00a0people than we dare admit. One\u00a0out of two marriages is not hanging on ’til death. (That’s our divorce\u00a0rate.) Some couples are asking that the\u00a0statement\u2014\u201c\u2019Til death do us\u00a0part”\u2014be taken out of the ceremony.\u00a0They want such phrases as:\u00a0“Until we are no longer compatible,”\u00a0or “Until we no longer find fulfillment,”\u00a0or “Until we no longer desire\u00a0each other.” Some are writing their own marriage\u00a0contracts in which they put\u00a0renewal options. They propose to\u00a0maintain the marriage for two\u00a0(maybe three) years after which\u00a0time they can decide to divorce or\u00a0renew the contract. Others are\u00a0leaving the phrase in the ceremony\u00a0but are not taking it seriously.\u00a0Many people are putting a big\u00a0question mark after the word,\u00a0“death,” in the phrase. And one wonders if marriage has\u00a0a chance when entered into […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[16],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4327","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-pastors"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/nafwb.org\/site\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4327","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/nafwb.org\/site\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/nafwb.org\/site\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nafwb.org\/site\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nafwb.org\/site\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4327"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/nafwb.org\/site\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4327\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4328,"href":"https:\/\/nafwb.org\/site\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4327\/revisions\/4328"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/nafwb.org\/site\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4327"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nafwb.org\/site\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4327"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nafwb.org\/site\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4327"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}